I went to my home town this February for vacation. One of my relatives had come to our home and they were searching for a bride for their son. Here's what I learnt from them about the match making business.
First of all you're supposed to get enrolled in a match making agency or get introduced to the 'Aunties' who go prowling with eagle eyes looking for a girl/boy of the marrying age.
These agencies demand a fee for enrolment. Also if their matches do end up in weddings, both sides have to pay a whopping 10% of the wedding expenses!!! ( They'd be millionaires !)
1. They shouldn't be the only child in the family- Only child implies obligations (is it wrong if some people were concerned about our population problems? )
2. There should be at least a 2 year difference between their ages ( effectively excludes all people of your age whom you study or work with )
3. The girl should be quiet, timid and stuff. You know, the classical stereotype. ( what happens to the normal ones who don't behave like soap stars?)
4. The girl has to look tall, thin and fair ( Is it a crime to look normal & not like an anorexic runway model?)
5. The girl's family has to give around 100 Sovereigns of gold to the groom along with properties, a sedan ( no hatchbacks ) & meet all the wedding expenses. (Is he marrying a girl or a kilo of gold?)
6. I even met few people who were looking for a 'foreign groom' and were trying to marry their girl off to a guy who was a virtual stranger to them simply because of the 'foreign' tag that came with this guy.
Conclusion:
Seriously..even a job placement needs an interview. They don't just select people simply by looking at your resume. So, how can you just tell someone to get married to a person who has a nice photograph and a good resume? ( Ever seen most of the Facebook profiles? There's something called Photoshop, you know..)
P.S I am not saying that we should totally ban arranged marriages. But if we started looking at marriages as a lifetime thing rather than a business transaction, may be things would improve.
6 comments:
Hello Jebamalar, Anu here. Good to see you write this blog. I really appreciate your deep concern for what is happening around you. May be there is a deep cry for justice in ur heart. I just wanted to mention that there is no justice other than what Christ did for us on the cross. I will end my reply here incomplete for you to think this over. God Bless You
Anu Selvin
atta girl! that was nice writing! looking forward to more from you. and that thingy about arranged marriages is soooo true. will there be a change? yes, but i dont see one in the near future.
I know something about this marriage business. Happening around me for few years.. We'll surely speak of it when possible. An interesting topic and possibly can be a never ending talk ;)
@Anu Selvin: Thanks a lot for reading anna... I do have some more things to say about this..hope to post subsequently..
@Sharon: Thanks a zillion for taking the time to read and comment.. :) more rants coming up..
@Anandh: It is never ending..still..also thanks a lot for reading :)
good one!
@Revati Thanks.. :)
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